“Don't you ever let a soul in the world tell you that you can't be exactly who you are.” - Lady Gaga

                I’ve been having ‘big’ thoughts lately thanks to some reading and a couple of groups I meet with every week. I’ll start with a little fact about me. I am borderline obsessed with Lady Gaga. I love her music, her personality and guts, and her message. Even with her provocative outfits and word choices, she has a strong, clear message she speaks. In case you don’t know her story, a quick background: Stefani Germanotta was bullied during her school years. She said that she was different and always felt like a freak. She struggled for years, but finally made it as a pop star. She speaks out as an LGBT activist, campaigned to raise money for the prevention of HIV/AIDS, started a non-profit organization for youth empowerment, self-confidence, and anti-bullying.  She really talks and tries to connect to her fans and speaks the message of self love and fighting against rejection from others and yourself. (To find out more about Lady Gaga, you can learn a lot on her Wikipedia page or at www.ladygaga.com)

                Anyways, my obsession with Lady Gaga comes into play with relating her message to something we’ve been talking about in prayer groups. After St. Monica-St. George’s retreat last month, the Women’s Group has been reading Henri Nouwen’s Life of the Beloved. In a section of his book called Taken, Nouwen discusses how we are all the chosen children of God. He loves us unconditionally, with the good and the bad. This is a hard concept to understand, and even more so, fully accept. It is hard to think that if I do something wrong that really upsets me, that God still loves me just the same. Yes, He probably wants me to do better, but he never stops loving me. And if I do something great, I’m sure He is proud of me, but I can never do anything that will make Him love me anymore than He already does, or anymore than He loves anyone else. An excerpt from the section really stood out to me:

                 The world is “manipulative, controlling, power-hungry, and, in the long run, destructive. The world tells you many lies about who you are, and you simply have to be realistic enough to remind yourself of this. Every time you feel hurt, offended, or rejected, you have to dare to say to yourself: “These feelings, strong as they may be, are not telling me the truth about myself. The truth, even though I cannot feel it right now, is that I am the chosen child of God, precious in God’s eyes, called the Beloved from all eternity, and held safe in an everlasting embrace.”

                It discusses the reality that the world is not a perfect place. Actually, it can be quite terrible at times. Bad things happen and everyone, including you and me, has dark days during their lives. But through all of this, God loves you just the same. He loves you even when you can’t see why and even when you reject His love. After reading this I knew I had to print it out and hang it on my wall. You should too! I know it will be encouraging on bad days, and the good days too. Nouwen goes on to discuss how self rejection is a way of not accepting God’s love. We allow other people and things to determine our worth and make us feel rejected or unaccepted. Nouwen says that God has chosen us, we have a meaningful purpose in this life, and He loves us. This is where Lady Gaga comes back to us J

                “When the whole world has their eyes on you, if you say something that doesn’t truly come from your spirit and your soul, or if you wear something that doesn’t come from your spirit and your soul, it’s  an injustice to your position. And so, I’m really myself every single day and I do it because I know my fans would want me to.”

                -Lady Gaga

                Lady Gaga has found that she is happy being herself and that you should never let anyone else make you feel less than you are. She wears whatever she thinks is artful or meaningful to her and doesn’t let anyone else make her feel bad about it. She stands for what she believes in and won’t back down. It is a great message, I think, to hold true to. Be yourself! Stand up for yourself and what you believe in! Love yourself! You are a chosen child of God! Why not live up to your full potential when you are loved by God and he wants you to be you?! So, I hope this long post (sorry) has made you think about and appreciate God’s love for you, inspired you to go out there and be exactly who you are meant to be in this world, and maybe even sparked a little interest in Lady GagaJ I’ll leave you with a final quote from Lady Gaga that she spoke to her audiences during her Monster Ball Tour:

                “Tonight I want you to forget all of your insecurities. I want you to reject anyone or anything that ever made you feel like you don’t belong or don’t fit in or made you feel like you’re not good enough or pretty enough or thin enough or can’t sing well enough or dance well enough or write a song well enough or like you’ll never win a Grammy or you’ll never sell out Madison Square Garden. You just remember that you’re a superstar and you were born this way!

                May tonight be your liberation from all those things.

… I would pray and dream that one day just one person would believe in me, so when you leave here tonight, know that at least one person believes in you.”
               

Know that God always believes in you. So love the awesome person that is you!

<3 Katie

"There's nothing like having a basic need met"

It's funny what things stick with you.  Clare has said a few times: "There nothing like having a basic need met!"  Usually referring to when you're super thirsty and finally get to take a drink of water or when you really really really have to go to the bathroom and finally get to go.  It's just a wonderful time really.

So why has that stuck with me?  I guess because it made me laugh...and because it's just so stinkin true.  Yesterday I decided to partake in a fast along with other St. Monica St. George parishioners and by the time mass rolled around at 7pm I had gone seven hours without eating.  Obviously I was nowhere near starving but I was definitely hungry and couldn't wait to finally have some dinner after mass (ya know, meeting a basic need).  Well as I sat down after communion, a satisfied voice inside my head went, "Nothing like having a basic need met!"

Hello epiphany moment!  Sometimes my brain can be pretty smart......or maybe that's just God talking haha. But really, that voice is true.  There's nothing like receiving Christ in the Eucharist.  There's something about the fresh start that is just so necessary to the human soul and the Eucharist gives that to me.  I need that forgiveness and acceptance and then the strength that comes from Christ alone.  I take all that mess that's happening in my life and after receiving the Eucharist, it all seems so small.  And man do I love that feeling.

So yes, Clare, I agree.  There's nothing like having a basic need met...especially when that need is met in the Eucharist ;)

Until next time,
Mel

It is what it is

Do you ever get so caught up in your to do list that nothing actually is accomplished except more worry and anxiety?  I feel like that has been the story of my last two weeks.  Because my semester is divided into terms, I just started a new class.  While I love learning about the miracle of life aka maternity childbearing, I must say I am easily stressed with the idea of a new teacher, new clinical instructors, and different testing styles. And of course my attention has been solely focused on classes, occasionally interspersed with work.  Lately, I have been living my life according to due dates for assignments.  And frankly, I have been quite a slacker when it comes to prayer. 

While I still might be doing alright in school and completing everything, I still feel like my life is slowly falling apart.  It is not like I have experienced a traumatic event that makes me feel this way.  It is all the little things that I keep telling myself are not a big deal.  For example, as I am sure you have noticed, I have not been very successful in blogging.  My night prayers are becoming far and few in between.  Not exactly the best way to start off lent. 

I like to be told “It is okay.  I am sure it is no big deal” because I think it allows myself to be less accountable for my mistakes and unmet expectations.  But, sometimes I just need to be told how it is.  This week I have discovered the little black book my parish handed out at the beginning of lent.  (It has been sitting on my dresser since Ash Wednesday, yet another example of slacking).    On Tuesday’s reflection, it talks about how last Sunday’s gospel is not a typical message that we normally hear.  Yes, He is a forgiving God.  But, I cannot go through life making excuses for myself.   The passage goes on to say “God is patient….but not doting.  God is forgiving….but not wishy-washy.”   Much in the same way of the gospel this Sunday, sometimes we just need to be told how it is.

Yep, I think it is fair to say God has called me out on this one.  I am not very happy with myself for letting precious time slip by without trying to gain a deeper understanding of God.  But, I do not want to let myself prolong attending to my spiritual needs any longer than I already have.  How do I fix this? Well I am not sure I have the space for that.  But I must say that challenge for the day is a great place to start.  The goal is to start taking responsibility for the choices I make today.   I think taking responsibility allows the depth of the situation to sink in: good or bad. 

I feel like this passage was a harsh reality check; but, obviously necessary.  Sometimes to move forward, I have to backtrack.  For today, I will hold myself accountable for my spiritual needs. 

Peace,

Dana

Servant of God Sylvester of Assisi

There are four stages in becoming a saint. During each stage the person that is being considered is given a title. The titles follow the order: Servant of God, Venerable, Blessed, and, finally Saint. During the first stage, the bishop where the candidate died will open an investigation into the life of the individual, who is called a Servant of God. Today, instead of focusing on a saint, we look into the life of a man that is currently on the road to canonization, specifically in this first stage. Sylvester of Assisi was one of the first 12 followers of St. Francis of Assisi and he was the first priest of the Franciscan order.

Sylvester was the descendant of a noble family, and had sold Francis, who had previously renounced his family, some bricks. Francis was to use these to build local churches that had fallen into disarray. While Francis was with Bernard of Quintavalle, a local nobleman who had decided to follow Francis and give up all of his wealth and possessions, Sylvester complained that he had been paid too little for the bricks that he had sold Francis. Sylvester had fallen prey to greed, much like we all have. For example, has there ever been a time where you claimed more than you actually deserved?

Sylvester received his compensation, but felt guilty. Therefore, he change his mind, gave up all of his possessions, and decided to follow Francis. He ended up becoming one of the first priests in the young Franciscan order. He prayed very often and lived a life of poverty, even becoming a favorite companion of Francis, someone that Francis would come to for advice on all different matters.

It was said that there was a civil war raging in Arezzo, a city that Francis and Sylvester had traveled to, and Francis had instructed Sylvester to drive out the demons from the city. Sylvester proclaimed, "In the name of almighty God and by virtue of the command of his servant Francis, depart from here, all you evil spirit." Afterwards, the demons left and peace returned to the city.  

Sylvester was one of Francis's original companions and he is buried in the Basilica of St. Francis. The cause for his canonization has been brought up by the Friars minor. 

Do we sometimes put too much emphasis on material goods, power, or prestige. It is difficult, but we must realize that these things do not fulfill us, it is God that brings true happiness. This is the epiphany that Sylvester, and even Francis, had, and helped them to decid to devote their lives to prayer and evangelization. We can learn much from these holy men.

Luke
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References:
Pope John Paul II, 1983, Divinus Perfectionis Magister, Art I, Sec 1
"Servant of God Sylvester of Assisi". American Catholic.org.

Challenges for a Teacher

I'm a secondary education major and this semester I've had a challenging practicum placement.  I'm only in the school two days a week but I'm getting a taste of the frustrations that go along with being a teacher.  I mostly focus on the 12th grade calculus class.  They are all lower level, often lazy and unmotivated students.  Mix in senioritis and negative views of math and you've got yourself one hot mess!  Honestly, they are a hard class to control, especially because they just really don't care about the subject and they don't see me as an authority figure.  It's rough trying to get them to listen to what I say.  I repeat myself often because they don't listen the first and second time around and they get angry when I move on before they are ready.  It's frustrating and it makes me second guess myself as a teacher.  Can I really handle this job?  I become impatient and frustrated with my students for the lack of respect they show me.  If they will not respect and listen to me, then why should I care?

Thank heavens that God is not like that.  This teaching thing has given me a whole new appreciation for our amazing God.  How many times does he have to repeat himself for our sake?  How many times do we ignore what he says?  How many times do we not show him the respect he deserves?  And yet he responds with nothing short of infinite love and care.  He does not get impatient or think any less of us!  He is incredible to us even when we spit in his face.  I think about several of my students...I don't have quiet the same attitude towards them.  I love this new found appreciation for the amazing teacher that God is.  I pray that I can learn to be more like him to always respond with love to my students.

Until next time,
Mel

St. Gabriel of Our Lady of Sorrows

Sometimes it is the little things that count. We must use love in even the small details of our life. It is the way we treat people each and every day that makes a difference. It pleases God not only when heroic deeds are done, but when we treat others with compassion. Who knows, the little things might lead you to holiness, much like today's saint, St. Gabriel of Our Lady of Sorrows.

Francesco Possenti was born in Assisi, to a large professional family, with his father working for the local government. Tough times had struck the Possenti family early on, for Francesco's father had to travel often because of his job, and his mother and two of his sisters had died when he was still young.

Francesco definitely enjoyed living life to its fullest, going to parties, dating different women, and even earning the nickname, "the dancer." Nevertheless, he had multiple brushes with death, which included falling ill and nearly getting struck by a bullet. He vowed to enter religious life after he recovered from these experiences, but it was simply brushed aside. Furthermore, one of his brothers died and another committed suicide. It was not until he fell ill again, that he put his vow into motion and applied to enter the Jesuits. Unfortunately, he was denied, most likely because of his age, but this did not stop him. Again, after another one of his sister's deaths, he applied and was accepted into the Passionist Congregation.

A large part of Francesco's family, including his father, tried adamantly to dissuade him from joining the Passionists, but this was to no avail. After arriving at the novitiate, Francis received his habit and the name "Gabriel of Our Lady of the Sorrows." Gabriel excelled both academically and spiritually, always remaining joyful. He prayed often, loved the poor, and cared about other people's feelings, never failing to focus on the small things. At this time, Gabriel started showing the first signs of tuberculosis, but this did not slow him down in the least bit.  His peers remained by his side, and he maintained strict observance of Passionist followings, showing amazing devotion towards the Virgin Mary.

Gabriel would have his writings burnt, for fear of the temptation of pride. And, before being ordained, Gabriel passed. However, immediately before his death, it is said that he sat up, with his face radiant, grabbing for a figure that was not visible. Some believe that he had seen the Virgin Mary.

Gabriel displayed valiant virtues in the short time that he was alive. He never gave up, he always kept a smile on his face. He was meticulous in his love, caring for every single person, no one was insignificant in St. Gabriel's eyes. St Gabriel of Our Lady of Sorrows is a true example to both young and old of how we should treat other people and how we should live our lives as children of God.

Luke

The Space In and Around Us

In this upcoming Sunday's Gospel, Jesus told this parable: "There once was a person who had a fig tree planted in his orchard, and when he came in search of fruit on it but found non, he said to the gardener, 'For three years now I have come in search of fruit on this fig tree but have found none.  So cut it down.  Why should it exhaust the soil?'  He said to him in reply, 'Sir, leave it for this year also, and I shall cultivate the ground around it and fertilize it; it may bear fruit in the future.  If not you can cut it down.'"

This Lent I am part of a Facebook Lent retreat, which is really cool because it encourages me to read the upcoming Sunday Gospel all week long!  This parable really resonated with me because it reminded me of my own story.  In this parable the gardener knows how important it is to fertilize and cultivate the area around the tree.  The same goes for us, the space we create in and around us is important for our spiritual growth. 

I really understand this message.  For a long period of my life, and even occasionally now, I fed lies to myself.  You know, the typical insecurities types of things like "You're really not that pretty" or "No one would ever really love you because (insert character flaw here)."  I'm sure we've all been there.  That is NOT cultivating the space around me.  Those lies will NOT help me produce "fruit" and make the world a better place.  Then, when I got to college  I grew in my faith as I began to know God better and to know his character better.  I began to love myself because God created me.  As I really began to better understand  Jesus' undeniable, unfailing, and complete love for me, I began telling myself truths.  As awkward as it might be, I started to look in the mirror and smile because God made me beautiful because he made me me!  Most people wouldn't notice much of a change because I was always a happy person but I definitely noticed the incredible, deep, internal happiness I found as a result of these truths and recognizing my true worth, not the lies.  And with that happiness, the world was a much different place for me.  That's cultivating the space around me.  Love and acceptance help me produce fruit.  Why would I want negativity and doubts when I could have positivity and confidence?  Love is powerful and wonderful and that is what I need because they make me want to give back with everything I have!  And that is producing fruit =)

Until next time,
Mel